My mind was plunged into chaos - questioning everything. Every decision, every choice I had to make overwhelmed me. When working on portraits or on fashion shoots, I failed to direct. I couldn’t helm the situation. I couldn’t instruct people. My mind was in a frenzied mess – which was reflected in my lack of confidence. I doubted everything – especially my ability to make decisions.
The experience of being present at a gallery opening featuring my work. When I become a face in public, lifting my mask of anonymity - an outing experience.
Coming up in October, one of my diptychs will be shown at the Espacio Gallery in London, UK. Read here for more information!
Even as someone with HIV, I sometimes struggle to find the exact forms of infectious behavior. There seems to be a prevalent “half-knowledge” of what is seen as risky, and of what is seen as safe sex. People tend to have a bit of an idea, but nobody really knows the details or exact ways of transmission. The HIV Kama Sutra will hopefully change that.
Images confronting the challenge of an HIV confession, as well as the perception of my approach to women after my diagnosis. What was before? What is after?
Photography documenting the everyday - medication and procedures that accompany an HIV diagnosis. Holy relics of a science based life.
Combined with the medical approach, the contradictions between the medical and the poetic confrontations are in constant contrast to one another. My perception of blood and its meaning shifts constantly. Poisonous, reason for my infection, but giver of life.